A Two Wheeled Upgrade to the Liv Invite | Velocipedagoguery

Melissa Georgesson hefting a Liv Invite bicycle. House Morningwood | Rise Before Dawn.

Though I can (and do) run every day, I thought biking wasn’t for me. Despite his Hodor-like size and general gracelessness, I just couldn’t keep up with 2CentTac. I would huff and wheeze like I was dying.

But…

Before I gave up on the idea (mostly because I’m stubborn), I upgraded to a much newer dandy horse (velocipede? penny farthing?) — I bought a Liv Invite.  It seemed like it would do everything I needed it to do.

Bam! Appearances were not deceiving. It was like night and day.

Continue reading “A Two Wheeled Upgrade to the Liv Invite | Velocipedagoguery”

Beware: Hot Brass (NSFW) | Fine Calibers III

It’s no secret we like girls women and guns. And women and swords, and women and axes, and women and Apache helicopters for that matter. Here are a few of the former in assorted fine calibers. We’re aware of the “gun bunny” thing. However, when it relates strictly to our aesthetic appreciation, the Second Amendment, and capitalism, we refuse to spend time in pointless frumication. The energy we might otherwise have spent in perhorrescing, thinks we, would be far better spent indulging our lexiphanicistic tendencies…

Continue reading “Beware: Hot Brass (NSFW) | Fine Calibers III”

Griffon Industries Raises Its Banner

Griffon Industries is a part of the Morningwood Bazaar - the House Morningwood marketplace

We are beyond chuffed to announce that Griffon Industries now has its own pavilion in the House Morningwood Bazaar! This California-based company is known for numerous collaborations, including with Steel Flame and Mark Owens, and for a wide variety of tactical equipment and range accessories.

Members of House Morningwood (i.e. qualifying Patreon supporters) who shop our splendiferous cyber souk will receive up to 35% off their purchase from Griffon Industries.

Grunts: souk.

Among the gear Griffon Industries provides:

HMMS – Heat Mirage Mitigation System for Suppressors

Griffon Industries is a part of the House Morningwood Bazaar. Rise Before Dawn!

📷@realshootervegas

Cover 📷 @marckhnanishoGriffon Industries is a part of the House Morningwood Bazaar. Rise Before Dawn!

📷 @black_rifleGriffon Industries is a part of the House Morningwood Bazaar. Rise Before Dawn!

They also make and sell backpacks.

Griffon Industries is a part of the House Morningwood Bazaar. Rise Before Dawn!

Griffon Industries is a part of the House Morningwood Bazaar. Rise Before Dawn!

Griffon Industries is a part of the House Morningwood Bazaar. Rise Before Dawn!

Their holsters and padded riggers belt have proven to be very popular too, as best we can tell.

Griffon Industries is a part of the House Morningwood Bazaar. Rise Before Dawn!

Griffon Industries is a part of the House Morningwood Bazaar. Rise Before Dawn!

📷 @southerncrossllc

Griffon Industries is a part of the House Morningwood Bazaar. Rise Before Dawn!

They’re also known for the Griffon Girls, of course, which we can certainly understand.

Griffon Industries is a part of the House Morningwood Bazaar. Rise Before Dawn!

Griffon Industries is a part of the House Morningwood Bazaar. Rise Before Dawn!

Griffon Industries is a part of the House Morningwood Bazaar. Rise Before Dawn!

If you’re looking for good equipment, you should keep an eye on Griffon Industries (connect with them on Instagram, @griffonindustries).  Before you buy anything, however, join the ranks of our Patreon supporters. It’ll pay for itself pretty much immediately.

The House Morningwood sigil - Rise Before Dawn
House Morningwood has called the banners. Support us on Patreon!

House Ghostgrey Declares for Morning Wood

House Ghostgrey (you may know them as Grey Ghost Gear and Grey Ghost Precision) have declared for House Morningwood. They were among the very first to answer when we called the banners.

Grey Ghost Precision offers 25% off everything they make to Patreon backers who are at the Knight level.

Grey Ghost Gear offers 40% off everything they make to all Patreon backers of Bastard Knight level or higher.

Think about that, now. A  GGP MKII Heavy .308 WIN retails for $2,500.

You do the math.

House Ghostgrey Sigil, Banner, and Words

Long live House Ghostgrey!

Support Us on Patreon - House Morningwood Sigils

Revengers Recruited | 13 Hot Superheroines

Busty Superheroines hottest cosplay boobs bouncing - Wonder Woman - Power Girl - Scarlet Witch - American Maid - Black Widow - Harley Quinn - She Hulk - Supergirl - Catwoman -and -others

The success of Avengers: Infinity War this last weekend got us thinkin’. AIW is now the biggest opening movie of all time, and although that doesn’t necessarily mean the most profitable, you know damn well it’s gonna make a lot of money. Hell, it’s already past $250 million, and it hasn’t opened in China yet.

Big movie audience in China.

Anyway, we’ve decided to recruit our own team of supers in preparation for the Affinity War. All hawt females, of course, with the exception of Swingin’ Dick and Slim. Here’s who we have in our lineup so far.

Continue reading “Revengers Recruited | 13 Hot Superheroines”

Mantrackers and Gunslingers | Gunslingers Who Are Mantrackers

One of the things we want to highlight here on the House Morningwood blog, at least from time to time, is stuff our sworn swords, writers, photographers, flunkies, former contributors, and assorted other allies do elsewhere.

They do some badass stuff, all over the damn place, and not just where you’d think to see ’em either.

This particular case is something Mike Searson wrote for Gunslingers magazine. Though our Trails Found event was a couple years ago, it’s still producing content.  In this case, a spotlight on legendary tracker Jim Grasky of Trails Found and our very own Freddy Osuna of Greenside Training.

Nice work, Mike!

If you want a back edition of this article you can pick one up in digital or print here. FInd Mike on Instagram, @mikespartansearson.

Flagrant Beard Raises Its Banner! | The Morningwood Bazaar

Flagrant Beard - Flagrantly badass - House Morningwood Bazaar

RISE BEFORE DAWN!

We are happy to report that the Tennessee-based Small American Business Flagrant Beard has lofted its banner for House Morningwood, and is now a part of the Morningwood Bazaar.

Our Patreon supporters, er Sworn Swords, will now be able to walk the aisles of House Morningwood’s cyber marketplace and purchase whatever Flagrant Beard gear they’d wish without a second thought…or fear of remonstrance when they return home.

What sort of gear, you ask?

Well, knives, for one thing, knives. Knives like the Flagrant Forerunner and the Havoc, as you’ll see below.

Flagrant Beard Joins Morningwood BazaarFlagrant Beard Joins Morningwood BazaarFlagrant Beard Joins Morningwood Bazaar

There is also a wide variety of EDC gear and apparel available at Flagrant Beard, including an impressive lineup of quality belts.

Flagrant Beard Joins Morningwood BazaarFlagrant Beard Joins Morningwood BazaarFlagrant Beard Joins Morningwood Bazaar

Did we mention they make individually serialized ‘hawks for hewing?

Flagrant Beard Joins Morningwood BazaarFlagrant Beard Joins Morningwood BazaarFlagrant Beard Joins Morningwood Bazaar

Connect with Flagrant Beard on the ‘gramz, @flagrantbeard. Marvel at Dave’s fiery lambchops, and remember to join House Morningwood’s Morningwood Bazaar by supporting us on Patreon.

The House Morningwood sigil - Rise Before Dawn
House Morningwood has called the banners. Support us on Patreon!